Are you kidding person who puts single ply toilet paper in their bathroom?

There are very few places in this world where I can sit down and not be bothered. Where no one is going to interrupt me. Where I can just grab some quality me time. Sometimes I choose to go there and sometimes it chooses me. And although the latter isn't always pleasant, and is the main reason why when I go to restaurants that give out matches I grab a handful resembling a fat kid's in a candy jar, there are very few things that bother me when I sit down to 'take care of business'. Except one. Are you kidding person who puts single ply toilet paper in their bathroom? If anyone ever asks me if I want to know what it feels like to ride down a banister made of tree bark and sand paper naked, I'll kindly tell them no thank you. I already know. They'll inevitably ask me how and I'll reply that I had the Moo Moo Mr. Cow from Moe's for lunch (Best deal in the place by the way. Small Burrito. Drink. Chips. AND A COOKIE. For about $5. How can you beat that?) and your bathroom was the closest, approximately30 to 45 minutes after I finished eating. And don't argue that it's cheaper or is better for the environment. There are some things you don't cheap out on and the extra ply in my toilet paper is pretty close to the top of the list. Plus the fact if I am using your bathroom chances are you're a pretty big corporation and can afford the extra money that it would cost to by some Charmin. (I know you the reader are thinking, "What about when you are at a friend's place who stocks singly ply?". Simple answer. I am not friends with people who stock single ply.) And if it comes between a tree and my wiping comfort. I'll take my comfort every time. Sorry Earth. Single ply toilet paper is a job half done. Just think if everyone took the approach you take when it comes to toilet paper. What would have happened when Kevin McCallister was preparing for the Sticky Bandits in Home Alone 2? (Not the Wet Bandits. That was in the first one. Get your head in the game.) The happy ending in Rockefeller Plaza never would have happened and the holiday season of 1992 would have been ruined all because you were too frugal to buy a quality of toilet paper better than singly ply.