Are you kidding pregnant teenaged pizza shop girl?

In a day and age where celebrities are all the craze, it comes as no surprise to see girls getting haircuts like their favorite television character, wearing clothes they saw in OK! Magazine, or making a sex tape with *insert somewhat-known musician/athlete/Austin Powers midget.* Celebrities are good looking, have tons of money, and, from the perspective of most Americans, live the dream life. But when teenage pregnancy became the new "shave my head and lose custody of my sons," one would think the line would be drawn. Well, one would think wrong. Are you kidding pregnant girl in the pizza shop? It's bad enough I have to read about the Alaskan teenager who got knocked up, happens to be the daughter of a Vice Presidential candidate, and wore an Ohio State hoody the same day she was photographed to be on the cover of the New York Post. (Ohio State supporters are fertile. Who knew? Go Bucks!) And it's bad enough that I had to read about the redneck teenager who got knocked up, happens to be the sister of the aforementioned celebrity who started the "shave my head and lose custody of my sons" trend, sending the Alaskan baby mama a gift. But for you to follow said trend and throw it in my face by wearing a shirt that reads, "I'm not fat, I'm just pregnant," well that's just too much. What's wrong with you? It was like your pregnancy was Rick James, and it just slapped me in the face. It's times like this, pregnant teenaged pizza shop girl, that you should choose your own destiny. A great animatronic Aztec Temple carving once said "the choice is yours and yours alone." And you should probably heed this advice. For if Ol' Mac from Legends of the Hidden Temple doesn't know a thing or two about teenaged pregnancy, then I'm a Silver Snake...or a pit bull who wears lipstick.